Crank

"crank is more than a drug.
it's a way of life. you can turn
your back. but you can
never really walk away."

"the monster will forever speak
to me"

I recently picked up the book, Crank by Ellen Hopkins. My kid-sister had read it and for a person who doesn't read much, her telling me she polished it off in less than a day...well it meant I had to see what all the rage was about.

Ironically, it's a tragic story about a girl named Kristina Wagner, who after a summer visit to her father's quickly dives down the addiction hole and despairingly tries to maintain an image with her family.

On her summer trip, Kristina falls in love w/ the neighbor boy under an alter ego and finds out that he often gets high on methamphetamine drugs with her estranged father. Her first love leads her down a dirty trail in under two weeks- and her first taste of what she calls "the monster" leaves her isolated, gang raped and craving for more.

After going back to her mother, stepfather and sister, Kristina struggles to keep up the relationship and perspective she left with. She has become a meth addict (aka, Crank), she lives in an altered state of mind just to be brave enough to take the drug and live on the wild side. She abandons friends, finds new ones, that aren't so pleasant, is raped a second time and gets pregnant as a result.

Hopkins writes as the character Kristina (or Bree, her alter ego)-her journal and poetic muse are simple, easy to read, and quickly draw you into her mental state of being. The short poems on each page serve a purpose to the story and each word is artistically designed to read as more than one poem. Frankly, I find the writing, itself fascinating.

What's more- is that the dark words that describe an insecure girl's life are something of an autobiographical tale for the author. Hopkins wrote the story as way to reach out to her own drug addicted daughter. The heartbreak described, I felt. And I was deeply saddened, that for this meth addict, there was no real resolve. Even after becoming pregnant and deciding to keep the child, Kristina admits to snorting crank on more than one occasion.

Over the years, I've taken interest in psychology, the function of the brain, and recently, how addiction plays with that. Meth is one of the most addictive drugs out there. With heightened sense of being, self confidence, sexual arousal and restlessness- it has the ability to create severe hypertension and heart problems. It can also cause aggression and causes an obsessive behavior, one that includes the constant need for the drug itself.

The story was heart-wrenching and the effects, the facts about the drug are more scary than comforting. Some countries have prescription allowances for meth, but unfortunately, due to the social high that it's known for: it is networked underground and is destroying people's lives. What I do find most positive about Hopkins story is that, while it may be sad, she shows that the resolve for being an addict is not an easy one and should never be done alone. An addict is always an addict and it is possible to get sober- but one must be willing seek help, therapy and support. It's the only way out. For those who are prone to drug use of any kind, you're not alone and drugs aren't the answer. So don't be afraid to face your fears and overcome your addiction. Don't let it follow the rest of your life....that life could be short.